Oh, Deb!

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“Oh Deb, stop being so naïve!”

Those six words.  Those impactful six words. 

They were mad mumbled many many moons ago.  There I was a relatively new academic administrator at a rural community college.  I was happily dancing in a world of teaching and learning having crazy-fun.  Everything was exciting.  Everything was interesting.  Everything had an air of college importance. I am not exactly sure of my stage of newness. But, I can say that my work world was full of just pure joy at every turn. 

At that point, there was a problem cooking on campus.  It was in my area of responsibility which was a bit large at that time.  The problem was a bit more than challenging and a bit less than catastrophic. Meaning that the world of student learning was not going to come to a screeching halt, but it was going to be impacted enough to bring the challenge to the attention of several levels of leaders . . . including me. My team was up to bat and I was in the line-up.

 As the newest kid on the administrator block, I was armed with a million ideas all of which I thought were tremendous and about a teaspoon full of experience. It was an incredible moment for me and probably a slightly uncomfortable moment for my colleagues.

And my background was coming into play. For . . .  as long as I can recall, in both my work world and my personal life, I have always thought that there is no crisis that can not be solved with a little ingenuity and lots of thought and lots of hard work.

For example, I am often perplexed as to why someone hasn’t invented the flying car, or why energy hasn’t been harnessed enough to end dependance on fossil fuels, or why teletransportation isn’t a reality.  I think that someone somewhere can solve the health puzzle to the point that we all will live a century and beyond.  I think world hunger can be ended, that world peace is possible, and that goodness will win at all times over evil.  Again, all solved with a little ingenuity, lots of thought, and lots of hard work. 

So, as I approached my first big collegiate challenge as a leader of learning on my campus, I was in the land of thinking big and broad, looking at everything that could be if I just put my mind to it.  I am certain that I probably rattled off more than fifty but less than one hundred potential ideas to avert the crisis.  And I am certain that all of the ideas were great however, each one needed resources way beyond what was available and reasonable.   I was certainly standing on the mountain of dream and was ignoring the world of reality completely.

Hence came those six words – “Oh, Deb, stop being so naïve!”

For a moment, the wind was definitely punched out of my sails.  I stopped thinking about what could be with a little ingenuity, thought and hard work.  I deferred to someone who had more experience than me.  I knew it was time for me to listen, to learn, to appreciate and consider solutions to the challenge via whatever the opposite of naivety is.  

Eventually the problem was solved, and to this day, I can’t even remember if it was solved effectively or not.  All I can recall is that for a moment in time, I stopped being naïve.  I acquiesced.  I actually became something new and different, and surprisingly, the world marched on.

It was at that moment, however, that I decided to never again – for as long as I remained in my job . . . for as long as I worked with my colleagues . . . on any project . . . for any reason . .  . to ever again stop being . . . naïve.

I figured out that naïve doesn’t mean impossible.  It doesn’t mean eternally gullible.  It isn’t just pie-in-the-sky thinking.  It isn’t a calamity. 

For me being naïve opens up doors to whatever is beautiful in the world.   It means having the  ability to look beyond what might seem unlikely and improbable – and to looks towards all that happens when people focus on all that is positive and possible.  It is intentionally ignoring potential roadblocks and setbacks and everything that can and might stop great ideas from growing.  It means shutting out negative energy and acting as if it does not exist. It means not only wearing rose-colored glasses, but to love putting them on.

So if in the future, you see me in a flying car or if I randomly teleport to your location,  please thank the colleague who called me . . . naïve.

A line is a line . . . until it isn’t.

The Golden List

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Early this spring, I started a new project. I have no idea how or why I thought of this particular idea. It just kinda came to me. I think I was sitting in what my family fondly calls the Big Room in our home – a space that is relatively quiet, on the second floor, furnished with all that represents yesteryear including a 1980s plaid sofa, a worn out pool table, several chairs that would fit in no home (including mine) but there they are in the Big Room. And there I was using one of them when this idea hit me.

On the surface, the idea is simple. Initially I gave myself thirty days to complete it. I actually chuckled at that thought as I figured I would have it finished in a day, two at the most. But as the timeline was going to be self imposed, I kindly allotted myself a month just to be on the very safe side.

The task centered around my next great writing adventure.  My blog has been chugging along for many years, and I thought maybe it is time to press on to new adventures and new worlds.  Maybe I need to take that big, giant leap forward.  After all, according to Mr. Gretzky – hockey’s The Great One, “You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take.” So, not moving my writing forward was much like not taking the available shot.  I will miss out for sure if I never try.

So, the new writing quest began.

Step one of the task at hand has been to identify one hundred words that describe . . . me. Words on this list could be nouns or verbs . . . or adverbs . . . or adjectives. All parts of the English language are welcome. The words can be positive or negative, simple, complex or compound. Slang . . . acceptable! Onomatopoeia . . . acceptable! Acronyms and abbreviations – thumbs up! The list can include words that describe my past, present, and/or future as long as each entry somehow tells the story of me.

It seemed so easy when I thought of it.  One hundred words with no holds barred.  A laundry list of what it means to be me.  I wasn’t challenging myself to anything so whoppin’ grand that it was going to take all my might to complete it.  Just a list of one hundred words.  I don’t even have to alphabetize them.  Just jot them down.  One at a time.  Until I hit one hundred.    

It’s sixty days later. Sixty days. And I have yet to even come close to finishing.  I’m not sure if I am embarrassed or scared. Or both. What does it say about me to not be able to quickly come up with one hundred distinct words that describe me.  Sadly, yesterday I noticed there was a duplicate, and it was difficult erasing from what was already slim in number.  

As of this moment, there are – count them – a measly thirty-nine words on the list of me. Thirty-nine.  Thirty-nine.

I’ve lived much more than half a century.  I have a family and relatives and friends and a house and stuff.  I’ve done a lot of the usual and some of the unusual.  I’d call it a good mix.  But, there are still only thirty-nine words on my list and it feels like I am permanently stuck there.

To make myself feel a bit better, I’m extending my timeline.  I’m giving myself an additional six months to see if I can broaden out the list.  I may resort to reading the big giant unabridged dictionary that is kindly sitting on the lower shelf in my living room.  Doing so, however, seems to walk close to that plagiarism line.

In any event, though my latest idea may have been a failure in that I have only met a bit more than one third of my goal, it has taught me much, much more than expected.  

I am only unique by a thin margin.  

Measuring differences is difficult.  

Before I can describe anyone else, I had better be able to describe myself.  

I got some work cut out for me